A campus relationship might be one of the most exciting relationships to handle. But surely, not all relationships sail through smooth waters. There are, however, certain behaviors one must never put up with in a relationship. If your college boyfriend at any instance does any of the following, listed below, you should know it’s time to rethink the relationship.
1. Disrespecting Your Boundaries
Healthy relationships regard and respect one another. If your boyfriend does not handle your given space, emotional, physical, or social, that sends up a red flag. Common instances include pressuring you to do things you don’t want to do, encroaching on your personal space, and not being respectful of or feeling comfortable with your need for alone time. They used that in their own interests, and that became harmful for you, as releasing that information could be harmful to you.
2. Excessive Jealousy and Possessiveness
Jealousy can be excused if a little but overdone is a problem. Suspicion, demanding to know where you are, or trying to dictate who you are hanging out with is a sign of intermingling. The majority of the time, this is directed from his insecurity and can turn into full-blown control.
A supportive partner would be one who would encourage you to develop personally and academically; if your boyfriend looks down on your achievements, portrays your ideals as nonsensical, or makes your dreams appear as if they mean nothing, then he is presenting a red flag. He should be a source of encouragement and not a discouragement to you.
3. Dishonesty
Trust is just a drop in the ocean. A boyfriend becomes a pathological liar about small matters or hugely elongated issues. Secrecies in messages and conversations with other people, his whereabouts and recent activities, they all count as deceit. Trust is the bedrock of any relationship.
4. Manipulation and Gaslighting
This is one of the most damaging behaviors because it is subtle. If he over and over again puts doubts in your reality, shifts the blame on you for his faults, and manipulates the situation to make you feel guilty, then he is gaslighting you. Such emotional abuse will set off a time bomb in your mind, which is meant to determine your self-esteem and mental well-being.
5. Lack of Communication
Having an honest and open line of communication with one another is really important for any relationship. And if your boyfriend avoids important conversations, closes down when you’re trying to bring something up, or even makes you guess all the time about the way he is feeling, don’t commit. Effective communication is the first step towards sorting out all problems and understanding each other better.
6. Physical or Emotional Abuse
Any form of abuse, whether physical or emotional, is never acceptable. Physical abuse consists of battering, hitting, even slapping. Emotional abuse can be much subtler, but it consists of insults, threats, and constant criticism. If you are at the receiving end of something that feels like a violation in any way, it is important that help be availed to you at the earliest, and your well-being is taken care of.
7. Constant Criticism and Belittling
A boyfriend who criticizes you on anything, makes fun of your appearance, or belittles your opinion is really not worth your time. This behavior can compromise your self-esteem, leaving you to feel unworthy. A healthy relationship should lift one another up, not compromise your self-words.
8. Refusing to Take Responsibility
Everyone makes mistakes; it’s a mature partner who accepts the same. A boyfriend who consistently refuses to accept his actions as responsible, blames you for everything, or never apologizes to you for any of his mistakes has an immature display of quality. It is also a really important quality for one’s personal growth and the stability of the relationship.
9. Cheating
Infidelity is a huge break of trust. Well, if a boyfriend is cheating on you, it is a direct red signal that he does not cherish you and the relationship. Staying with a person who can betray you will just inculcate new pains and insecurities in you. You should be with someone who harbours genuine feelings for you.
Of course, breaking up is never easy to do. But remember: You are still important and you deserve happiness. Consider that when your boyfriend on campus does anything I mentioned above, why not break up? You deserve to be with somebody who treats you respectfully, who supports and appreciates you. Do not settle for anything less.
