Being in a relationship while navigating campus life is an exciting experience full of challenges. There can never be a relationship without honesty, but on the other hand, there are certain topics and details which may be avoided for the sake of harmony and mutual respect. Some of these things you should consider keeping to yourself include:
1. Your Past Relationships
Talking too much about past relationships can lead to unwarranted jealousy or insecurity. Of course, everybody has a past, but describing your ex surely will provoke comparisons, bitterness, and so on in your lady. Emphasize the present and the future that you two will share, rather than staying stuck in the past.
2. Money Issues
Be forthcoming with your partner about money, but do not constantly drone on about how hard it is on you, for this will put pressure upon your partner. Be mindful and responsible in the way you manage your money—don’t hesitate to use the campus resources or consultants on managing finances. But sometimes, do not relay every issue there is regarding finances to your boyfriend/girlfriend.
3. Personal Insecurities
Everybody has insecurities, but stating them time and again to your partner may shift the focus of your relationship to constantly being reassured. Work on your self-esteem with the support of friends, family members, or counsellors, but do not put the entire responsibility onto the partner for boosting your confidence.
4. Negative Views about Their Friends or Family
Criticizing a partner’s friends or family members may stress them out, putting them in an awkward position. Express your misgivings in a respectful and positive manner. Never put your partner in a situation wherein they are forced to make the ultimate choice between you and their loved ones.
5. Mundane Details of Your Daily Life
While sharing your day with your partner may be good, it can also get tiresome if you overload them with every minor detail. Keep the conversation interesting and meaningful, and allow space for other topics and interests and let them flower in the relationship.
6. Comparisons with Other Relationships
You should never compare your relationship to the others because each relationship is different, special in its own way. This will only lead to dissatisfaction, not to mention unreal expectations. Respect your partner and the relationship you share with him/her, never comparing or looking to see what is going on in other people’s houses.
7. Secret Crushes
Admitting to having a crush on someone else breeds distrust and insecurity. Sure, one is bound to get attracted to other people, but there is no need to express it to your partner. Work on fostering your current relationship instead.
8. Judgments about Taboo Subjects
Sharing strong opinions about sensitive topics like politics or religion can result in very heated arguments, most especially if you have totally different opinions. Handle such discussions with much respect and openness, and agree to disagree if necessary for peace’s sake.
9. Transfer or studying abroad plans are not discussed.
If you are considering transferring to another campus or studying abroad, make sure you discuss it with your partner early on. It can feel like a betrayal if you spring this kind of big decision on someone.
10. Every argument you have with others
Constantly discussing conflicts with other people will make you drama-hungry. Handle your fights on your own and only ask for help when you really need it, but do not make your partner engage in every fight you are having.
Conclusion
However, the key to a sound and balanced relationship on campus is always knowing what and when to reveal or conceal. As much as honesty is the stepping stone of every relationship, discretion in sharing plays an equally crucial role. Cultivate trust, respect, and mutual understanding with your partner by wisely selecting the what and when of it all. Sometimes, keeping some things to yourself might bring more harmony and satisfaction into your relationship.
